I speak to many women who often feel disempowered in at least one area of their lives.
Sometimes they don’t even realize it, but in truth, they are giving their power away.
The truth is that we all give our power away and too often. Wouldn’t you agree?
So let’s look at this critically important topic.
Where are you….
- not speaking your Truth?
- perceiving someone as “better” than you?
- feeling like a victim?
- secretly hoping someone or something will come and rescue you?
- tolerating toxic relationships and patterns?
- playing small and doubting your dreams and desires?
Going after your dreams will kick up some old patterns and blind spots where you’re still giving your power away.
These are energy leaks.
In business they can translate into profit leaks as well [ouch].
Wherever you are giving your power away, you are not living in your Truth and in possibility.
I raise this topic because in my adventures on the West Coast, I’ve gotten really present to this as have my clients.
Especially those places where you give your power away in the hopes that others will save and rescue you: clients, parents, friends, joint venture partners, your bank account, your doctor… you name it.
This can show us as a feeling of ” I need __x__” in order for y to happen.
I need clients to pay my bills
I need someone to drive me to where I need to go because I don’t have a car
I need a man to support me
I need my parents to make me feel safe
I need a cushion for when I fall down
I “can’t” do this
This doesn’t in any way mean that we can’t benefit from the help of others in our lives because we do.
But it’s when we give them all the power to the point that what we need is contingent on someone else doing something for us, in order for us to be ok, then it’s NOT ok.
It’s that I NEED…feeling that trips us up.
It gets us to do inauthentic, sometimes disingenuous things in the hopes of a specific, desired outcome.
And people can smell neediness and desperation a mile away.
We’ve all been there so don’t beat yourself up.
And, if this is you, STOP!
The antidote is to ask yourself a couple of high quality questions:
Question #1: What do I REALLY DESIRE?
Question #2: What do I need to create this desire authentically and powerfully?
Question #3: What kind of support do I need to create this desire?
For example, if you aren’t making money in your business to sustain it, perhaps taking on some part-time work to sustain your business is the most empowering way to honour your desire and still feel powerful.
If you’re transitioning into a new business and are feeling stuck and scared, perhaps the next best option is to talk to a coach you respect that can help you create a plan of action that’s authentic to you.
It is so easy to fall into the trap that we need others to live a powerful life.
What we need is to own our power and to live from this empowered place trusting that we are already powerful and that we can invite others to contribute to our lives.
Coming from a place of contribution rather than a feeling of neediness are night and day opposites.
When we feel empowered we do what resonates with our Truth and are more comfortable saying no.
When we feel needy to create a sense of co-dependency and clinginess that’s repelling and doesn’t allow for true and authentic connection.
So when you feel that feeling of neediness come up ask yourself this instead:
What do I really WANT?
Then ask yourself how you can do those things from a place of loving Truth and unwaivering Trust in the Universe?
The answer will never be to kiss up to someone else, to feel needy, to feel powerless or to wait for someone to come up with the answers for you.
It will rather be, I want to feel free, powerful, courageous, independent, respected and to ask for genuine support that can help you generate your own answers etc…
I get that it’s easier to try to cling on to someone or an opportunity thinking they can “save” us from our problems. But it’s a short-term fix to a bigger issue of allowing ourselves to Trust in ourselves and in the Universe.
Trust is a muscle and one that allows us to live in our Truth with more authenticity, connection and love.
Some thoughts from the road.
What came up for you today? I’d love for you to share that with me below.
