On June 23rd, I married my love on a gorgeous rustic ranch in San Diego amidst 70 of our closest family and friends.
We designed our wedding to be a celebration of love and it warmed our hearts that our guests commented on what a wonderful, loving and authentic experience it was for them; in fact one of the best weddings they’d ever attended.
Perhaps what I’m most proud about was that the experience was a genuine and thoughtful experience of us and a community effort.
For example, my client and chef extraordinaire and CEO of Vivacious Dish gifted us our wedding cake and a selection of 5 mini desserts (passion fruit mousse recipe upon request).My good friend’s husband gifted us rumba lessons for our first dance and my dear friend Jill was our day-of coordinator (not a small task)! Our bilingual ceremony was officiated by a Catholic priest and a Buddhist monk.
There’s no doubt that getting married was the best decision I’ve ever made.
It has surprisedly given me space to open myself to new possibilities, to feel more grounded and rooted and it has also given me permission to reflect on and re-prioritize what’s important to me and what I and we get to choose in partnership.
It has also generated some insights that I wanted to share with you today in the hopes that it will be a contribution to you as well:
1. LOVE: let it lead the way: From the start, our vision was to let our wedding be a representation and a celebration of love – for all – not just our relationship. We gave thoughtful care to how we could infuse fun, connection and play into the experience while being an authentic representation of us.
It was about how we wanted people to FEEL and creating experiences that anchored and activated that feeling of love in others. And it showed.We led from our hearts as a way to connect with the hearts of others and in turn people said they were deeply touched and moved by the whole day.
*Life/ business lesson:
Where can you lead from your own heart and soul?What is true and genuine for you to share, create, and to ask for right now?What containers can you create that are heartfelt and nourishing for you AND your clients? This means letting go of what’s “appropriate” and doing things YOUR WAY.
2. Staying True to Your vision & Trusting the Process: After researching many options, I realized I knew what I wanted: an intimate, family-style rustic wedding amidst people we loved.I wanted the experience to feel informal and intimate and still beautiful.I wanted to spend time with our guests and to have fun and to dance.I wanted it to be infused with meaning without a choke-hold of perfection.
We spent months looking for the right venue.I wasn’t willing to compromise and I trusted my gut. Once I found the place, everything fell into place and the entire process unfolded pretty effortlessly.I knew this was our next step and despite the stress of event planning and some sleepless nights, I felt enormous INNER PEACE knowing that this next step of marriage would create more for our lives.
*Life/ business lesson:
Don’t compromise on what you truly want and be willing to trust yourself, Divine timing and the process.Don’t give up or let others tell you what’s true for you.You know best always.
3. Loss, joy and the polarity of life: I was warned by several people of the post-wedding crash. After 6+ months of intense planning, I definitely felt the void after our event ended.What I felt the most was the absence of our loved ones once they returned home.It was magical to have so many people we loved and adored celebrating with us under the same roof and once they all started to leave, it left me craving more connection time.
A week after our wedding, I learned of the passing of a dear client of 3 years from cancer on the same day that a friend’s mother also passed. The news hit home and put me in a state of shock and grief.
Amidst such a magical time, it brought up my own fears of loss.
Brene Brown talks about how to handle life when things are so good you are afraid of things going wrong.
Brene mentions how GRATITUDE is the best medicine for when you fear losing something good and PRESENCE and GRATITUDE have certainly been great helpers at this time.
And even amidst happiness, it’s ok to feel what you feel. Trust that there is wisdom in your experience and give yourself permission to lean in while also not allowing yourself to be defined by your experience.
How can you learn and grow from what is in your awareness right now?
Sometimes polarity is a great teacher to see our growth edges and to choose more of what we want to experience and where we can ask for and give ourselves the support we need.
It’s ok to be where you are and you are always at choice. Staying present, choosing gratitude and not judging our feelings and what is can create opportunities for growth and deeper self-exploration.
4. It’s ok to re-prioritize and to change your mind: Getting married opened something up in me.I feel like I’m now choosing for 2 vs 1. How it’s been showing up is a willingness to choose what I hadn’t been willing to choose before.
While I’m still my very own strong-willed independent self, being in a partnership to me now means that my choices affect another person, our future and more.
As a result, I’ve been re-examining (yet again), what my priorities are and to ask the difficult, unreasonable and impractical, “crazy” questions:
- Do I really want to stay in business at all? If so, what’s my next step?
- What kind of a life experience do I really want to create for myself and with Alex?
- What had I been unwilling to choose that I may be willing to now?
- What is my SOUL asking of me now and how willing am I to listen, choose, act, be and to receive that I wasn’t before?
* Life and business lesson:
It’s ok to change your mind just because you want to. Trust yourself and your awareness.
5. YOUR SOULFUL LIFE: Choosing & creating beyond time: How motivates your choices? As I’ve taken a step back to explore what I want to create next it has meant really looking at how I’ve made choices in the past based on a time-frame (i.e fear and ego).
Then last week during a long conversation with Alex I had an epiphany:
“What if I fully allowed myself to take my time with what I want to create?”
What if I gave myself permission to CURATE MY LIFE AS ART?
Art cannot be rushed.
It’s informed by soul, its own Divine timing.
It’s not linear or predictable.It’s unwilling to do anything but what it feels called to do and to express.
Creativity, inspiration, connection, spaciousness, presence & artistry YES PLEASE: I will have more of ALL this.
*Life/business lesson: If time or fear weren’t an issue, what would you choose for yourself right now?What would your life and business be like if you chose what your soul is asking from you and you were WILLING TO TRUST THAT GUIDANCE?Let time work for you – that’s also a choice.
6. The GREATER GOOD: Designing a life beyond business.
For so long, my single focus on growing my business meant that I had a myopic view of contribution. I felt limited to contributing to the world through my business only. However, a couple of years ago, a colleague showed me how she was infusing philanthropy into her business model and the power of making small steps that contribute to the greater good.
It sparked the awareness that I could do business AND support the greater good and that I didn’t have to wait until someday to do something “big” for my contribution to be meaningful.
And now, I’m feeling a stir to contribute to something bigger than myself and that transcends my work.
Perhaps you’re feeling the same pull. If so, what is calling to you? And are you willing to listen to what comes to you?
Is it to start donating to a charity you admire (through money/energy/connections)?Or following up on one of those awesome “crazy ideas” that you’ve been sitting on? Or connecting with a colleague who is doing something you admire and seeing what’s possible?
*Life/business connection: Be willing to give yourself permission to explore what’s possible for you without judgement, hesitation or a time-frame.It will show up if you give it space AND you are willing to take baby steps or leaps.Every contribution/choice creates.If you want to contribute through your business, you can certainly give a portion of your income/ from a project or program to a charity you admire, do volunteer work etc.Let it look and feel like you.There is no right or wrong way to do this.
Before closing today, I want to take a moment to thank you for being a part of my life, my business and my journey. It continues to be a blessing and a privilege.
And if I may be so bold, I want to celebrate me LOL!
It has taken 44 years to realize this incredible dream: of true partnership. The wedding, while also a dream come true, was the icing on the cake of a deeper and more magical foundation: my relationship with Alex.
And finally, may our love story be an inspiration to you that your dreams CAN COME TRUE and that leading with and trusting your heart creates MAGIC!
And please remember:
That you ARE WORTH IT. That dreams DO come true.
That you can do things YOUR WAY.
Trust yourself and your journey.
You are never alone.
Sending you sweet love and bliss,
P.S.:To check out or sneak peek wedding photos: click here.
P.S:In the next week watch out for more information on the 28 day DIY Soul Primed Program. It’s designed to help you connect with your soul’s inner wisdom and to tap into high frequencies of abundance, love and possibility. The result is that you can trust yourself more deeply and be your most aligned and confident, magical self. 🙂