And it’s true.
I’m that girl that goes to the microphone in a crowded room of thousands to ask a question. I was the frequent student in class that raised her hand with lots of questions. I’m the one saying yes to being on camera whether it be video or photographs.
I’ve got that level of visibility down. Expressing myself in that way feeds my need for connection and self-expression.
But lately, I’m being called to share a deeper level of visibility and it’s kicking my sweet Brazilian ass.
It’s called: being authentic.
As my guides call it: be yourself 100% of the time, especially when you are feeling off. To which my no-nonsense New York attitude says: F*** off!
I’m all about being genuine and sharing truth bombs.
But this level of authentic visibility pushes on my edges – specifically my fears of being ridiculed and rejected for not looking professional enough (aka being judged for looking tired, sounding incoherent and dare I say boring!).
It could be a year of intense quarantine and noticing the extra pounds on my hips and thighs, the white hairs along my hairline, the new wrinkles around my eyes and just the flatter energy that does not make going on camera remotely appealing.
I believe that energy matters and when I’m in pain, feeling sad or just royally pissed off and scared, doing a live video is the LAST thing I want to do.
I value and appreciate other people doing showing up when they aren’t at their best (even if I too secretly judge their wrinkle and frown lines etc) but stepping out in this way and more consistently is as appealing as drinking wheatgrass (it makes me gag!).
And I bet that I’m not alone.
As you’re doing your inner work, laying the groundwork for your body of work or seeking to elevate its reach and influence too, you may be bumping up against this as well.
At first I found myself feeling sorry for myself then judging myself for putting these lives “off”. My content manager Katie keeps asking me: “So are you going to do your live this week?” And I start mumbling, changing the topic and not giving her a solid reply. By resisting it, I just kept making the fear grow stronger and giving these lives more power than they deserve.
And then today, I got the Universal nudge I needed to put things into perspective.
I was reading an Instagram post by Kelly Diels where she shared some wisdom from a couple of colleagues that reminded us to be advocates of our own work and business.
Feel into this wisdom.
What does it bring up for you?
In full honesty, I haven’t been a true advocate for my work because I haven’t fully trusted it or seen its power yet. How’s that for being authentic?!
I’ve been pretty open about how creating, sharing and being the steward for the Soulfluent® body of work has wreaked havoc on not only my nervous system but also my imposter syndrome!
But what if – we don’t have to believe it’s all going to work out, “fake it until we make it” (I hate faking stuff!) or have healed all of our shit to be advocates of our work?
Because here’s the truth: you know shit already. You’ve got a ton of life experience. You’ve done some pretty epic shit too, I’m sure of it. You’ve got some pretty potent wisdom to share right now in this moment.
You have proof that your innate gifts (even if you still discount them because they come so easily to you) are magic.
Bottom line: You have made the lives of other people better. Have you not? (don’t add to this yes/no question please because I can hear your self-doubt and judgement trying to chime in here).
So why not, when in the presence of choice, you choose to partner up with your work and your business and give it a chance to win and to trust it even if you are still growing into your own belief of it all working out?
The truth is that attitude goes a long way in business.
And this entire year, my guides have constantly been chiming at me: “Priscilla, give yourself a chance to win, child!”.
An astrological forecaster I hired earlier this year told me my theme for the year was that no matter what, to know that I am constantly winning in my business – and to look for the signs that I AM.”
For a default skeptic like myself, it’s definitely an energetic recalibration.
But it’s also an incredible gift to give to ourselves, right?
The gift of winning.
The gift of allowing.
The gift of BECOMING.
I don’t want to “fake it” until I know more, trust more, allow more, receive more.
I prefer to EMBRACE more of who I am and who I am becoming and that means being willing to befriend and to challenge those fears, beliefs and patterns that don’t support the next level of leadership and visibility that I’m stepping into.
So this week, whatever your visibility edges, I invite you to ask yourself:
- Where am I already an advocate for my business and my work?
- What edges am I being called to stretch into and what’s that ONE baby step to get more comfortable in this new (and future) zone of genius?
- Where can I see that each ounce of content (aka visibility) is a gem of transformation, insight and possibility for someone else?
- Where can I make this about helping a stranger or a future client with a problem they are having a hard time solving right now?
Wherever your edges are, I applaud you.
Whether you are tip toeing into the arena and then running back into the bleachers – congratulations.
Whether you are hanging out in the arena or living in it fully – microphone in hand and all – bravo.
And if you are in a stage of transition and trying to reset, replenish and restructure – I honour your bravery and I see you.
I’d love to hear what your edges are and what you are doing to move through them.
And I’m sharing with you below a brand new offering (think of it as an extended VIP day with all the spaciousness you really want but don’t always get).
Sending you sweet hugs and chocolate kisses,